


there's nothing wrong with you, it's true.

by whimsicalMedley



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Coming Out, Identity Reveal, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Michelle Jones, Other, Pining, Trans Male Character, Trans Peter Parker, Transphobia, [mj voice] gender is a social construct why would i have one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-21 18:30:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17048372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whimsicalMedley/pseuds/whimsicalMedley
Summary: “No you don’t, MJ! I know that you think you know everything, but you can’t possibly understand how bad dysphoria is! It sucks, because I can’t even articulate how I feel when I look in the mirror! It just feels wrong!” Peter’s voice got progressively louder through his speech, and MJ took a deep breath to calm themself, “I hate it, I hate how I look and how we don’t have the money for me to transition, and I hate that I’m angry over that! I just—”“I’m nonbinary.”Peter stopped short, and turned to MJ, his eyes wide.“You’re what?” He gaped, and MJ rolled their eyes.___Or, the one where Peter Parker finds out that MJ is nonbinary, and does everything in his power to be annoying as possible.(It’s not like they appreciate his concern or anything.)





	there's nothing wrong with you, it's true.

**Author's Note:**

> me, nb: wow i love mj!!!!  
> me: WAIT-
> 
> anyway michelle jones is nonbinary and you can't stop them!!!!!!

_ They say, "don't dare, don't you even go there, _ __  
_ Cutting off your long hair, _ __  
_ You do as you're told." _ __  
_ Tell you, "wake up, go put on your makeup. _ __  
_ This is just a phase you're gonna outgrow." _ _  
_ __ —The Village by Wrabel

* * *

When MJ was a kid, there was no “sign” that they’d end up the way they did.

No, they acted like every girl at that age. They wore the dresses and played with the barbies and dressed up like a princess. Sure, they were quiet, but the thought of making themself have to talk to people had always freaked them out. So, nobody really knew what to do when MJ announced “I’m nonbinary” at the dinner table.

Their parents didn’t understand. Sure, they tried to be supportive, and MJ knew that their parents loved them, but it was still…not what they needed. The amount of times that Michelle had to casually say “it’s they, mom, I told you that.” or “dad, I told you I wanted to go by MJ now, not Michelle.” were too high to count, and eventually MJ just gave up. MJ knew when to pick their battles. This one was too tiring to continue.

School was hell. Nobody really talked to them, so MJ was always misgendered. The people they had told either tried to act like they forgot, or didn’t give a shit. The one good thing about having no friends was that you never had to correct anyone on your pronouns. MJ wasn’t lonely, though.

They weren’t.

“Hey, look! It’s Penis Parker!” MJ looked up in irritation as Flash called across the cafeteria, his voice cocky and malicious.

_ What a prick. _

And MJ was ready to leave it at that, really. It wasn’t their business. But then they looked over at Peter’s face.

Peter Parker wore his emotions on his face, clear as day. And right now, he looked upset as hell. His face had turned scarlet, and MJ could see his clenched fists, along with how he was biting his lip. His body radiated distress, and MJ’s eyebrows furrowed. Then, they noticed that Peter actually had tears in his eyes.

_ Jesus, I have to do everything myself. _

“Hey, Flash.” MJ called lazily, causing the entire cafeteria to turn its attention to them, “we get it, you’re an insecure cishet who’s scared of things his tiny brain can’t understand. Stop embarrassing yourself. This entire “macho tough guy” thing you’ve got going on is sad as fuck. Sit down.”

Flash was gaping at them, to which MJ returned with a sarcastic smile. Eventually, however, he sat back down. MJ nodded to themself, and went back to their book.

Until they felt someone sit next to them.

Feigning disinterest, MJ continued to read. They knew who it was, but why he was sitting next to them was weird. MJ knew that if they looked up, they’d see a stupidly sincere and ridiculously attractive face, which would make their heart stutter in their chest.

_ Gross. _

“Hey,” Peter Parker cleared his throat awkwardly, “I uh, just wanted to say thank you.”

MJ sighed dramatically and looked up at him, ignoring how their heart  _ did  _ stutter a little as they took in his shy smile and wide eyes.

“Don’t mention it, Parker.” They replied, and Peter’s cheeks turned a light pink. MJ ignored how endearing that was.

“No, seriously. Not—not many people are willing to do that.” He said softly, and MJ felt her heart clench at his tone. Like he was used to being put down.

“Well most people are dumb.” MJ muttered, and Peter smiled at them. MJ felt their lips pull into a tentative smile of their own, which made Peter’s smile turn blinding.

“Can I sit here today? Ned’s off with Betty.”

And, against their better judgement, MJ said yes.

* * *

After that day, it kind of became a thing.

MJ would arrive at the lunch table with their book of the day, and a few minutes after that, Peter and Ned would walk in together, geeking out about something nerdy, and sit with MJ. Ned across from them, and Peter on their right. Then, Peter would ask MJ what they were reading, which would launch MJ right into a rant about the book, with either a positive or negative reaction. It occurred to them one day that they had never talked this much to other people.

It was nicer than MJ thought it would be.

* * *

After lunch became a thing, so did weekly movies at the Parker household. The first time Peter had asked them, he was so nervous that it almost made MJ laugh affectionately. Which, no, yikes, they have a reputation.

“I was uh…well Ned and I, we uh, have a movie night every Friday, and since we’re friends, I—I mean we! We wanted to know if you wanted to come.” He rambled, running his hand through his hair absentmindedly.

MJ pretended to think about it, like they hadn’t already made up their mind.

“Not like I’m doing anything anyway. Sure.” They sighed, and ignored how butterflies erupted in their stomach at the sight of Peter’s delighted smile.

So, yeah. Movie night was a thing. And if MJ sat close to Peter and spent half the movie looking at him, well, nobody needed to know.

* * *

Finding out that Peter was Spiderman was really too easy. He and Ned weren’t exactly subtle.

MJ waited for a good time to confront him, though. They wanted him to squirm a little too, because a flustered Peter Parker was a very cute Peter Parker.

(Not that they would  _ ever  _ admit that.)

Turned out, MJ wouldn’t get to decide when they revealed that they knew.

It was a normal day, all things considered. MJ had gone to school, rolled their eyes when Peter made up a flimsy excuse to go do his superhero thing, and went home. They were writing up an article for their blog now, humming absentmindedly as words poured from their fingertips. Then, MJ heard a tap at their window.

Warily closing their laptop, MJ made their way over to the window to see Spiderman waving to them. A sigh escaped them, because really? Now? Then they saw the blood.

MJ rushed to open the window, ignoring the panic clawing at their chest. MJ didn’t get panicked. It wasn’t their thing. They didn’t feel emotions at all.

Or that’s what they told themself.

“Hi there, MJ!” Peter said cheerfully, but MJ could hear the pain in his voice. MJ rolled their eyes and grabbed him by the arm, yanking him into their bedroom.

“Shut up, Peter.”

“Hey, don’t be—wait.” Peter stared at them, and MJ couldn’t help the groan that escaped them, “you know it’s me?”

“Yes, you idiot. I’ve known for months. You aren’t exactly subtle.”

Peter ripped his mask off then, gaping at MJ like they’d never seen them before.

“I don’t have time for chit chat, dumbass. You look hurt, so let’s fix that.” At those words, Peter seemed to remember that he was indeed injured, wincing as MJ skimmed their fingers over his torso. After instructing Peter to sit down, MJ walked to the bathroom to get the first aid kit.

They couldn’t stop shaking.

Yeah, they knew being a superhero was dangerous. It involved a lot of running towards the danger. But a part of MJ had always thought that Peter was above that. The thought of him dying had never crossed their mind.

Now, however…

MJ shook their head, grabbed the first aid kit, and walked back to their bedroom.

“Alright Parker, suit off.” They instructed, and Peter hesitated. Annoyance flared in MJ, and they glared at him, “I can’t help you if I can’t get to the injuries. Take it off.”

Peter averted his eyes, and MJ held their tongue. They could tell he was about to explain.

“I don’t…my chest.” He whispered, voice wobbly, and MJ blinked.

_ Oh. _

The whole school knew that Peter was trans. Freshman year, after winter break, Peter came back with a haircut and new clothes, along with an unshakable resolve. He would calmly correct people when they used his deadname or used the wrong pronouns, even if they were an asshole about it. It didn’t seem to affect him at all, so people eventually dropped it.

MJ knew better.

They had seen him in the library, near the back, crying after his packer had fallen out of his pants and Flash started to call him “Penis Parker.” When he went to the bathroom, MJ had left a box of tissues and their candy bar. The look on Peter’s face had been worth their lost lunch.

“Peter. I really don’t care. I need to look at how bad you hurt yourself, because otherwise I can’t help. I’m not going to make fun of you. Please, just let me help you for once.”

Peter blinked in surprise, and then slowly moved to take the suit off. When it was off, MJ allowed themself to smile at him. Not the sarcastic one they usually sported, but a real one.

“Thank you for trusting me.” They said softly, and MJ ignored the tears in his eyes. They knew that he wouldn’t want MJ to say anything, anyway.

The damage wasn’t pretty to look at, but it wasn’t serious. MJ cleaned the cuts, wrapped the bruises, and ignored the trembling in their hands. Then, MJ realized Peter was wearing his binder.

“Wait a second.” MJ stood up from where they were dressing Peter’s leg, leveling him with a glare, “are you wearing a binder right now?”

Peter flinched, and MJ felt a little bad. But they kept going.

“Peter. You’re not supposed to be exerting yourself in a binder. You should know that.” MJ said, and Peter let out a tired sigh.

“I know that, but I can’t…” He trailed off, and MJ had a feeling they knew where this was going, “I can’t stand not wearing it.”

“You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep this up. I know dysphoria sucks, but—” MJ started, but Peter cut them off, glaring at them hotly.

“No you don’t, MJ! I know that you think you know everything, but you can’t possibly understand how bad dysphoria is! It sucks, because I can’t even articulate how I feel when I look in the mirror! It just feels  _ wrong!” _ Peter’s voice got progressively louder through his speech, and MJ took a deep breath to calm themself, “I hate it, I hate how I look and how we don’t have the money for me to transition, and I hate that I’m angry over that! I just—”

“I’m nonbinary.”

Peter stopped short, and turned to MJ, his eyes wide.

“You’re what?” He gaped, and MJ rolled their eyes.

“Nonbinary. Gender is a social construct, so why the fuck would I have one?” MJ replied, and after a few seconds of silence, Peter began to laugh. He had to sit back down, clutching his sides as he cackled. MJ felt their hackles rise.

“My gender isn’t funny, you dick.” They hissed, and Peter finally calmed down.

“No, I know!” He snickered, and then said, “that was such an MJ thing to say, though. I don’t know why I was surprised. Of course you would reject gender altogether.”

MJ ignored how his tone had gone so soft and fond. It didn’t mean anything. Nothing at all.

“Well, you know me.” MJ said in the flattest voice they could manage, ignoring the pounding of their heart. After a few seconds, MJ moved to sit down next to Peter. He automatically rested his head on their shoulder, and MJ had to take a deep breath to make sure they didn’t do anything stupid, like press a kiss into his hair.

“Thank you for trusting me.” Peter muttered, and MJ just nodded, not trusting their voice.

Well. At least they both came out.

* * *

The next time they hung out, Peter sat MJ down and started with the questions.

“First off, I wanted to thank you again for trusting me enough to tell me.” Peter started, and MJ rolled their eyes, but they both knew it was for show, “and now, I wanted to ask you what pronouns I should use for you.”

MJ stared for a second. Nobody had ever asked them that before.

“Uh…they/them are what I prefer, but she/her are okay.” They said, and Peter’s eyes went serious.

“You don’t need to say that she/her is “okay” if you prefer they/them. If you want to be referred to with they/them pronouns, just say that. I’m not misgendering you anymore.”

MJ ignored the way their breath got slightly uneven.

“Okay. They/them are what you should use, then.”

“Got it. Now, are you out?” At that question, MJ sighed.

“Yeah, but…” At Peter’s curious head tilt, MJ continued, “my parents don’t really care. They still call me Michelle and use she/her, and everyone at school either doesn’t know or doesn’t care either. So I’ve stopped caring too.”

Peter put a hand on their forearm, and MJ raised an eyebrow.

“I really don’t think that you don’t care about getting misgendered all the time.” He said, ignoring MJ’s glare, “I remember before I was out, how it felt. How whenever someone deadnamed me, I wanted to scream. When I got called “miss,” my skin crawled for hours afterwards. You deserve to be respected.”

MJ’s throat felt tight when they said, “well I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t have to be.”

Peter pulled them into a hug, and they both pretended that MJ wasn’t getting Peter’s sweater wet with tears.

* * *

Peter’s transition into using MJ’s preferred pronouns wasn’t seamless. MJ really didn’t mind, though, because he was trying. That’s what mattered. When he did mess up, he would look them in the eye, say “I’m sorry, them,” and then continue the conversation.

MJ couldn’t deny that they were falling fast and hard.

It was so refreshing to be addressed correctly. It had never happened before, and even though MJ would never say it, they were grateful. They were so grateful.

“Hey, MJ!” MJ looked up from their book to see Peter running towards them, the biggest smile on his stupid, dorky face, “Ned and I got a new video game, you  _ gotta  _ come play with us!”

MJ didn’t even fight the smile that spilled across their face.

“You guys are losers.” They said, but grabbed the hand that was offered to them anyway.

And if MJ didn’t let go until they made it to Peter’s apartment, well, nobody needed to know.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: whimsicalmedley


End file.
